Hiding in Plain Sight: Reclaiming My Voice and My Freedom
Or alternatively titled:
After six years, a divorce, and questioning my entire existence...
I remember vividly the day I proudly wrote in my author's bio that I was working on my paranormal myth-retelling sapphic romance, Dora: Plain Sight. I remember knowing, without a doubt, that I’d have it finished, and likely published, in a few months at most.
Then life happened.
More accurately, the rug was ripped from under my feet, and I no longer had a stable foundation. My marriage, my band, my family, and every person in my periphery I’d classed as friends suddenly shunned me and began acting strange. I was forced to seek therapy to understand why. I still don't know, nor do I care, as I am happy to say I am so much more aligned and fulfilled within my quiet life with just me, my son, and my cat. And books. Always books!
Writing took a back seat while I focused on protecting my life and my child, and rebuilding from ground zero. Narcissism is not pleasant. You never think you are a victim, especially when you believe you are a strong, independent, "I can do it all" kind of person.
Sadly, the stronger you are, the bigger a target everything you build becomes for destruction. My outlook now, after some serious shadow work and cutting away, is this: towers only fall when they must.
I am free. Finally!
Being able to finish my books, my music, and get back to my secure centre of balance has taken a long time, but I'm grateful I'm back, and I'm better.
No, I don't have a support system, a grand group to rally around me and celebrate my wins. Nor a team of editors, betas, or a community as excited about my writing as me.
I have me and a keyboard in a backwater community in Brazil.
But I have peace and a determination to tell my stories.
Dora ended up being more than what I first imagined. The characters, in a sense, reflected some of my own issues prior to me even realising I was a fish out of water and under attack. I resonated with Dora carrying an ancient truth: that at the very bottom lies hope, and that the light cannot ever truly be snuffed out. It just hides in plain sight.
Tina taught me that family doesn't mean those you share blood with, and that some partners were only ever in our lives because we didn't believe we deserved better.
This book helped me work through self-worth and love, starting over, and recognising hidden enemies in unlikely places. It was my lifeline, and I'm extremely proud of myself for finishing it and putting a full stop on that distorted and painful part of my past.
I am moving forward with fresh eyes and a newfound freedom, embracing all aspects of myself and my creations. My sapphic books no longer have to hide in fear of making others uncomfortable and insecure, and neither do I.
I am who I am, and I love me now. And I love this book. I sincerely hope you will too!
Here is the link if you would like to support my journey and this next chapter.
Much love, peace and light,
Bet Milner / Liz James
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